Age is Just a Number, Right?
This guest blog is written by Benjamin Bergstrand, a dashing member of Cowboy Curse. (The other two members are also dashing in case that sort of thing sways your judgement of a band.) The local 3-piece is yet another favorite of ours and we’re telling you to go see them this Friday (2/22) at Bender’s Tavern. It may be your last chance until the fall! Gasp! Rumor has it they’ll be busy with a new album and nino (that is Spanish for baby) until then. Take your $6 and see them with Blue Million Miles, the Still City and Mansfield Ghost.
(Ben starts writing….NOW!)
I just figured out that I’m 44 years old in rock-n-roll years. It’s a complicated formula involving your actual age, mortgages, drug use habits, children, TV watching habits, which periodicals you read, etc. The specifics aren’t that important, but basically Mick Jagger is 232, Thurston Moore is 75, and I’m 44. And it seems I’ve been making up a lot of ground in rocker years lately. Perhaps soon I’ll just fade into the black curtains of the Larimer Lounge or tumble down the stairs of oblivion at the Hi-Dive.
Unfortunately, a lot of us older rockers run into a brick wall of choices. That’s why our favorite bands dissolve due to life’s twists and turns. I can think of a handful that for one reason or another broke up, not because of fatigue or internal differences, but because the bass player took a job in Portland or the drummer had a kid. I miss you Bright Channel.
Longevity is elusive because, regardless of our life’s status, it’s not always easy for any of us to pursue our passion of making music. For most of us making it happen here in Denver, writing, creating, performing, and recording music that we love…we don’t aspire to be the next Meese or Photo Atlas. And I know there are some people out there, probably even good friends of mine that would say that if you’re not trying to “make it”, what are you trying to do?
So I’ll put it into very simple terms right here: I’m trying to do what I love while living a life that I love.
I really can’t imagine what my life would be like if somehow I had to drop everything else in my life, pack up a bag, my guitar and amp and tour 360 days a year. Or even a quarter of that. That said I’m sure the opportunity will come knocking now.
Does the fact that I’m not hell bent on getting Cowboy Curse on wheels for the bulk of the year mean I’m not driven to write good songs? Does an artist need to aim for the Guggenheim to create a beautiful painting?
At its best, music comes from the heart. From the soul. And for that reason I have hope for many of us in this Denver music scene and our own sustainable longevity.
Not every band can do what we do. I’m very fortunate to have two band members that don’t think twice about supporting me and respecting my choices. They’ve been unbelievably flexible in scheduling rehearsals and shows. When I came to them this fall and told them that my wife and I were expecting another child in May, they didn’t get upset even though they knew things would only get more difficult. I take that as the highest compliment that they stick with me and continue to put their hearts and souls into and behind my songs.
So maybe this is all coming from me, my view, and my own very busy and committed life. Sure. It’s very unrealistic for me to go anywhere. I live in a world that is ruled by a cute 16 month-old dictator named Ainsley. And that little dictator is about to be joined by another little tyrant in May. I have a career that I love. I have a wife that I love way more. I have a mortgage (go me!). I have a wonderful life outside of Cowboy Curse and I feel the pull that makes our favorite local bands breakup. Sometimes I feel how easy it would be for me to just stop writing and making music. But I really hope that doesn’t ever happen, and that I’m present in this Denver music scene for as long as it will have me.
Honestly, I feel pretty silly writing this. There are certainly other folks in this town that have already walked down the path I’m referring to. They’re already here and in some of my favorite bands. But when it comes down to it, we all know this isn’t a pissing contest and pissing contests don’t make for a healthy sustainable scene anyhow. Respect for differences and diversity is the key. And that’s one thing that I’ve felt lately as I’ve seen great new bands filled with younger guys and girls. It’s fantastic to see them doing their thing and know that some of them will share the stage with us sometime and blow my mind. And inevitably, there will come a day when they too will have to make some tough choices.
So what is it that I’m saying to you guys and girls out there in the Denver scene? Ah shucks, let’s grow old together!